Outrageously Funny Word Dictionary :: Speckled tail

👉 Okay, let’s tackle that wonderfully prickly little mouthful – the decidedly unglamorous, frankly rather alarming designation of...

“speckeled tail.’”

Now, a “speckeled tail," simply, is exactly what you think! It's a tail belonging to an animal (usually something small and probably prone to nervous darting around in undergrowth. Think pheasant pheasant pheasant, basically.) that has, rather haphazardly, decided to sport a veritable Jackson Pollock of mottled markings – individual little dots or flecks of varying sizes, colours, and frankly, what looks suspiciously like accidental splatter than careful design. Historically, the prevailing (and somewhat insulting, let's be honest) theory was this was simply a consequence of the animal rubbing vigorously against speckled ground cover, picking up the pretty bits and haphazardly sticking them to their posterior. However, modern ornithologists (who apparently spend entirely too long squinting at feathered bottoms, blessedly undisturbed by boredom) now suspect there might actually be… underlying neurotic embarrassment about the whole affair? Perhaps a subconscious attempt to look deliberately mottled as a form of disruptive camouflage, like saying, "Here I am, looking incredibly confusing and therefore not terribly interesting! Go away!" Essentially, it's a tail that looks a little like you accidentally threw a handful of differently coloured sprinkles at a badger. It’s the equivalent in animal markings to a badly upholstered armchair – you notice it immediately, then try very